I Never Really Wanted To Hit The Age Of Twenty

There's something scary about turning twenty. Besides the fact that you are one year away from be able to "legally" drink. The scary part is that you are no longer allowed to act like a child. People expect you to (as if it happens over night) suddenly have everything figured out. They want to hear your game plan for the rest of your life. What's your major? How old do you want to be when you get married? What's your five-year plan? Where do you see yourself in the next ten years? People please, I can barely figure out between cereal and a bagel for breakfast.

Being twenty is like being the awkward middle child. Your parents expect you to act like a big girl and do your own stuff. Then they want to hold your hand through the entire process, not allowing you to grow into your own person. At twenty I have came the realization that I will f*ck up. I will make huge mistakes. I will waste money on things I don't need and waste time that I don't have. But I could fall in love and meet the man of my dreams (if I haven't already). I could travel the world without a care. I can make risk and bounce back with minimal damage (hopefully).

I have decided to stop living my life so fearfully. To stop caring about the bullsh*t of this world. I can't let other people decide or tell me how I should be living. It's time to find happiness within myself and only for myself. So here it is, a moment of self discovery if you will. I will no longer do things that I don't want to do. If I want to stay in on a Saturday night and do absolutely nothing, I will. If I want to get a job inspiring others, I will. If I want to fall in love, I will. I'm going to stop making excuses and start doing what I think is best for me.

I never really wanted to hit the age of twenty but now that I'm here, I'm alive. I won't hold back anymore. I will live life to the fullest and at peace with myself.